Wentworth Miller opened up about his battle with depression and multiple suicide attempts as he struggled to keep his homosexuality a secret from the world.
The 41-year-old “Prison Break” star made the shocking confession during his speech at the Human Rights Campaign dinner on Saturday evening.
Wentworth Miller said his first attempt at suicide was at the age of 15.
The actor told the crowd, “Every day was a test and there was a 1000 ways to fail. A 1000 ways to betray yourself. To not come up to someone else’s standard as to what was acceptable and what was normal. And when you fail the test, which was guaranteed, there was a price to pay. Emotional, psychological. physical. And like many of you I paid that price”.
Miller revealed, “The first time I tried to kill myself, I was 15. I waited until my family went away for the weekend. I was alone in the house and I swallowed a bottle of pills. I don’t remember what happened over the next couple of days, but I’m pretty sure come Monday morning, I was on the bus back to school pretending everything was fine.”
Miller said his attempt wasn’t a cry for help because “You only cry for help if you believe there is help to cry for. And I didn’t need it, I wanted out… at 15.”
The actor said he was hesitant to come out as gay during his four-year stint on the series “Prison Break”.
Wentworth shared, “In that time, I gave thousands of interviews. I had multiple opportunities to speak my truth which is that I was gay. But I chose not to. I was out to family and friends and people I learned to trust but publicly I was not.
“I chose to lie – when I thought about the possibility of coming out, how that might impact me and the career I worked so hard for, I was filled with fear. Fear and stubborn resistance that had built up over many years. When I thought about kids out there who might be moved or inspired by me taking a stand or speaking my truth, my mental response was consistently, no thank you.”
Wentworth officially came out as gay last month as he took a stand against homophobia in Russia.
Wentworth Miller declined an invitation to the St Petersburg International Film Festival because of the country’s anti-gay laws.
It’s awesome Miller is going public with his struggles that will hopefully help others battling the same issues in their lives.
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